Has someone ever treated you like an enemy? Have you ever been unsure about how to respond to the different difficult people in your life? I sure have. A good friend and I were recently discussing it, and she shared with me some insight God had given her in her own quiet time. In studying the life of David, she noticed that David dealt with people differently. With Goliath, David went in for the kill (First Samuel 17). With King Saul, he kept his distance, but would not harm him (First Samuel 24--among other places throughout First Samuel). With Mephibosheth, he showed unmerited favor and kindness (Second Samuel 9:1-12). So, how do we know if the person we're dealing with is a Goliath, a Saul or a Mephibosheth?
Let's talk about the Goliaths in our lives. We can determine who is a Goliath by looking at the real Goliath. In First Samuel 17, we are told that Goliath defied God's people (verse 10), and this became a daily occurrence (twice daily, actually). He was on the side of the enemy, and not of God. In defying Israel, he was really defying the Lord Himself. David had righteous indignation against this attack on God and His people. In the strength of the Lord, he fought Goliath and won. Goliath was brought down and defeated. Goliath wasn't just a fellow servant of the Lord who had a misunderstanding with David. He wasn't a rude person David had trouble relating to. He was blatantly on the side of evil. In righteousness, David fought him. If there is a Goliath in your life, this person is not only against you, but against everything God stands for. These are the people who need to be challenged. This does not mean you should physically assault them. It means that you are to fight the good fight for the Lord in standing for the truth in the midst of their evil. Goliaths are evil. Don't try to be their friend. Don't try to make peace with them. However, on the flip side, we are taught to pray for our enemies (Matthew 5:44). God can soften the hardest heart. No one is beyond God's reach. Some of the greatest servants of the Lord were once wicked people. A case in point was Saul of Tarsus (later the Apostle Paul). For a while, Saul was the Goliath of the church at Jerusalem. In God's timing, He got a hold of him, and led Ananias to bring him to Christ. Before Saul was ready, though, God wasn't leading Christians to try and help him. Saul was an unreachable Goliath at that time.
In my own life and experience, I can think of one major Goliath I dealt with. This woman was my supervisor when I worked in a school-age program with the local district. The vast majority of my coworkers were professing Christians. This woman talked the talk, but something was very dark and sinister about her. She was cruel. I don't mean she had a brash personality. I mean she was cold and hard, and yet totally irrational. I noticed she was the hardest on the true believers at work, particularly myself and another lady. She attacked us daily, sometimes humiliating us. One day, it came out that she was actually practicing witchcraft, and that was her religion. The spiritual battles I had fought at that job suddenly made sense. The only way to fight was with prayer, faith, and truth. I spoke the truth in the face of her lies. Eventually our boss (who was a Christian) saw the situation for what it was. The witchcraft lady got in trouble, and I was moved to a different school that was an excellent fit for me. This woman was a Goliath. Only God can reach her, and I still pray He does.
What about the King Sauls we face? King Saul believed in God. He did not lead Israel into idolatry. But God wasn't that important to Saul. Saul was God's anointed, but he didn't live like it. When David became more popular than himself, he started to hate David, regardless of how well David had served him. Saul's bitter hatred led him to attempt murder of both David (First Samuel 19:10) and his own son Jonathan (First Samuel 20:33). It also led him away from running his kingdom wisely, and on a wild goose chase all over the place to track David down. Twice, David had the opportunity to kill Saul, but both times refused (First Samuel 24 and 26). In the second instance, David actually says: As the Lord surely lives, he said, the Lord himself will strike him, or his time will come and he will die, or he will go into battle and perish. But the Lord forbid that I should lay a hand on the Lord's anointed. (Verses 10-11). David was acknowledging that God would deal with Saul. He was giving the control over to God. He recognized that Saul was chosen by God for a purpose. He wasn't God's enemy the way Goliath was. God wasn't calling David to annihilate him. Saul had wronged David pretty seriously. Hating and wanting to kill someone is pretty bad! And yet he still wasn't a Goliath. In this case, God was calling David to remove himself from Saul, and refrain from hurting him--even blessing him when given the chance. I think many of the people we deal with are our King Sauls. I hope this isn't the case, but perhaps we are King Saul to someone. Sometimes, these King Sauls can be fellow believers whom God is using. These might be "God's anointed" in a sense. But that doesn't mean we have to be their best friend. It doesn't mean we pretend away their sin against us. It means we move away from them and focus on what God has in store for us...and if God crosses our paths, we try to be a blessing.
Most of the difficult people I have ever dealt with in my life have been King Sauls, not Goliaths. Some have been very cruel and difficult, some even dangerous. And yet, these people were not God's enemies. Most professed Christ as Savior. As God's children, they are under His hand, not mine. A particular example I can think of was a pastor we had when I was a young teenager. This man was charming, friendly and outgoing. He brought many people to salvation. Unfortunately, he felt threatened by other people serving God. I got in trouble from him for simply sharing Christ with some kids in Vacation Bible School and leading them to Jesus. This pastor claimed the problems was that I was too young to share the gospel like that. I believe he really feared losing any sort of control. He asked my family to leave the church, and then lied about us to others. We were not the only ones who got kicked out and lied about. I do not in any way diminish the good this man did. I thank God for using him. He is now in Heaven with the Lord. He is perfect, and is experiencing the rewards of his life--both good and lack. When someone is unsafe, it is my job to remove myself if possible. I am to heal up with God and safe people. It is not my job to harm them, ruin their reputation or antagonize them. Instead, get to safety. Surround yourself with good people who build you up in the Lord. Cultivate your relationship with Christ. Stay real about what has happened.
What about the Mephibosheths? Those are the people we are called upon by God to show compassion to. I think we sometimes mix up our Goliaths, Sauls and Mephibosheths. People show compassion on truly evil people like Goliath. Or they think they need to shower their King Sauls with a lot of love and caring. These are not the patterns we see in David's life. We are to fight the Goliaths in God's strength. We remove ourselves from the Sauls (but show kindness if God crosses our paths) and never stop being real about it. Mephibosheths alone are the ones we are called to invest in with our own heart and lives. These people receive our unmerited favor. Mephibosheth was the son of Prince Jonathan, and the grandson of King Saul. As king, David had every right to destroy all the house of Saul, and that included Mephibosheth. But instead, he intentionally sought out Jonathan's family. He wanted to show love on behalf of that old friendship. The account of this in found in Second Samuel 9. Also worth noting was that Mephibosheth was unable to walk, due to his nurse dropping him as a little boy. Having this infirmity also would have banned him from the palace. Being of the lineage of the former King and having this handicap would both have been points against him being in the king's good graces. But David showed godly compassion over propriety and tradition. Sometimes, God brings people into our lives who might be outside of our expectation, and He wants us to shower them with His love and compassion. These people don't earn it from us. They have a need God wants to use us to meet.
I had my first Mephibosheth when I was eleven years old. I went to a Christian camp for a week. I really hit it off with some fun girls my own age, and I remember thinking, "This is going to be a great week!" However, later on that first day, another group of campers arrived. One of these girls was also in our cabin. She was pretty and smart, but had a lot of baggage. She was from an abusive background. She said and did inappropriate things. She was hurting. Other kids ganged up on her. Deep in my heart, I felt called by God to befriend her. Some of the girls I had related to at first kind of distanced themselves from me, since they thought she was weird. I felt called to stand up to her when this happened. This girl shared some very disturbing stories of abuse with me--it was a lot for my innocent eleven-year-old mind to take in. But I knew God wanted me to be friends with her. That week, this girl received Christ in chapel. I was so glad God used me to be her friend when others were so cruel to her. Maybe I made that difference in her life. It was the very first time in my life I ever felt called by God to do something. This girl was my Mephibosheth. She needed a friend. We are told in Romans 15:7, Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God. The Mephibosheths need our love and compssion.
It takes a lot of discernment to determine who are our Goliaths, Sauls and Mephibosheths. We need God's guidance, so that we treat each one righteously, as we are shown biblically. I am so thankful for my good friend Briana for sharing this principle with me!
