Whoopings!

     I remember it like it was yesterday.  It was the summer of 1999.  I was a high school senior, and part of an evangelism team doing backyard Bible clubs.  We were doing open air witnessing to children in an apartment complex.  A friend and I were sharing the gospel with a cute little black boy who had introduced himself as Reginald..."But you can call me Reggie," he explained happily.  We shared with him God's love, and how God wanted Reggie to know him and live forever in Heaven with him.  Then, we had to get to the "bad news" about how all of us have sinned.  I asked him,  "Do you know what the punishment is for our sins?"

     "Yeah," Reggie nodded.  "My grandma gives me whoopings!"  

     My teammate and I looked at each other and had to try not to burst out laughing.  In the end, it turned out Reggie had already received Christ as his Savior, but was delighted we had shared with him anyway.

Summer 1999, I'm pictured with one of the friends on my evangelism team.

     Over the years, I've never forgotten about his grandma's "whoopings," and I have great respect for this woman I've never met.  She disciplined this little boy, and the result (as far as we could see) was a sweet child who knew Christ.

     Proverbs 23:13=14 says, Do not hold back discipline from the child, although you strike him with the rod, he will not die. You shall strike him with the rod and rescue his soul from Sheol.  

     Thirty-one states have banned corporal punishment from schools.  This is a controversial issue, but I believe the result of this has been 20 years of school shootings and students who believe the world revolves around them.  As a teacher myself, I can attest to this.  Every year, it seems they come in more and more entitled, and parents make more and more excuses.  In the last week, I have experienced two very painful injuries from such students.  The blame seems to always be put on teachers.  I wasn't calm enough when I asked them to stop.  Forgive me, but it's hard to be calm when I'm being kicked in the face, hard enough to leave a bruise.  In those cases, it's all I can do not to do something illegal, so forget calm!  Teacher's hands are tied.  There is no legal way to get things under control, because all we're allowed to do is say positive things to them. Legislators who have never set foot in a classroom tell us how we're allowed to discipline our students. 

     Professionals have medicated and given names to mental disorders based on behavior, and in a lot of cases, it doesn't help.  I'm not an expert on mental illness.  I know mental illness are very real, and in no way do I wish to invalidate someone's legitimate problem. There is a real need for medication sometimes. Those who suffer should receive grace and compassionate care that would truly help them.  We all need help sometimes.  That's part of being human. On the other hand, though I am NOT a psychologist, and I don't claim to know this,  I suspect that some of these mental disorders cropping up aren't real, but just a medical-sounding name for spoiled brat, poor parenting, or lack of discipline.  Some of these things are just plain sinful.  We're medicating sin, and therefore excusing it.  Our hands are tied as far as really helping these children.  On the other hand, I feel sorry for those who truly suffer from mental illness, because these spoiled brats getting falsely labeled with mental illness are bringing true mental illness to an incorrect public perception.  A person with a real mental illness shows up and shares their problem, and everyone thinks, "Oh no, not another one," because of all the out-of-control behavior misdiagnosed as mental illness.  In reality, those with genuine illness should receive compassionate care.  Those with just plain discipline problems need a spanking!

     It is possible for discipline to become abusive.  That isn't right, and in no way do I defend actual abuse.  Discipline should be lovingly administered.  Hebrews 12:6 tells us The Lord disciplines the one He loves.  Discipline is a sign of God's work in us, His love for us.  Our discipline toward children should have the same goal--love for them and a desire for their very best.  If all we're allowed to do is smile at them and say positive statements while they're physically harming us or others, we're not doing what is best for anyone--not the child, not the other children, not ourselves.  I'm not saying discipline is fun or easy.  It isn't.  But the lack of it produces such horrors that it needs to happen.  God holds us accountable for our words and actions.  Romans 14:12 says, so then, each of us will give an account of ourselves to God.  Children need that accountability as well.  

     Along the same lines, there are some incorrect thinking patterns feeding into this problem.  The whole it takes a village mentality sounds very idyllic, but it can be misleading.  Too many parents I have gotten to know over the years view the school, day care center, neighborhood, and church to be responsible for raising their children, instilling values into them, teaching them correct behavior.  While these institutions can and do help, they are no substitute for parental authority.  You can't pay anyone to love your child like you do.  Teachers love your children, but not like you.  Church workers love your children and pray for them, but not with a parent's love.  The same goes for kind neighbors.  All of these things should be supporting your role as a parent, but they can't raise your child for you.  As a teacher, I can speak for myself and say I dearly want to partner with parents, be a part of their team in helping their child.  But the parents are the team captain!  I want to do all I can in my role to help the child and family.  I am not the parent, though.

     This is all sort of controversial.  I have not intended to step on toes with this.  I realize there are wonderful parents out there who have children with severe problems, and they are trying hard to get a handle on it, not sure what to do.  I have not intended to be insensitive to them.  I am simply sharing some biblical truth, and my experiences as a teacher for many years.  Something is broken, and it will take the work of the Holy Spirit to fix it.  

     

Bold and Unashamed

     We live in an over-polite world where no one wants to offend anyone else.  Even though it is easy to complain about this and think fondly about days gone by, Ecclesiastes 1:9 tells us that there is nothing new under the sun.  History marches onward, repeating itself again and again.  The wise learn from it.  The foolish perish.

     Sadly, even the Christian world today is often caught up in the obsession to accommodate everyone and be non-offensive.  The whole "don't judge" phenomena has taken everyone by storm.  I often feel as if we're being asked to become unthinking robots with no opinion other than agreement with anything and everything.  Upon really examining this, though, one has to conclude that this isn't possible.  We can't turn off our humanity and become robots indefinitely.

     I have had fellow Christians tell me I should be ashamed of myself for calling sin what it is.  I've been called "legalistic" and "judgmental" for simply agreeing with what God has already put forth in His word.  I've had people tell me to take the plank out of my own eye, to stop minimizing my own sin and maximizing the sins of others.   Is there a danger of these accusations being true?  Of course.  Always.  As a Christian, I need to be watching myself, staying in the Word, listening to the Holy Spirit, and getting Christian accountability.  When I'm wrong, I should promptly admit it and make it right.  First Corinthians 10:12 says, let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall.  We need constant maintenance in our lives.  I am certainly not above this.  I try (though I'm not perfect) to humbly receive correction when I am wrong.

     There is a flip side of this, though.  When God calls me (or any believer) to say something about a sin (and believe me, we don't enjoy doing it!), and people jump on us and remind us of how imperfect we are, I am reminded of a well-known line from Shakespeare's Hamlet. "The lady doth protest too much, methinks."

     

     When people have to go crazy against a believer who simply agrees with God, this is clearly an overreaction.  Seldom am I confronting a person for their own sin (I think there are times when we're all called to that), but rather, talking about sin or impropriety in general.  Things in society that affect everyone.  Things that have become very public, demanding we take a stand.  Things like abortion, the LGBT (etc) agenda, fornication, adultery, dishonesty, greed, selfishness.  Scripture has a lot to say about every one of these, though they aren't my aim at the moment.  See some of my other posts, or better yet, the Bible for more info on any of these things in relation to scripture.  My point here is people's reaction to believers taking a stand--sometimes other believers' reaction to those of us who take a stand.  A lot of times, those who react aren't even committing that sin or lifestyle, but just have this urge to attack anyone who makes a statement that is less than absolutely positive. They're parroting society, which is very dangerous  If the world can condition Christians to just repeat their rhetoric, we're in a bad place.  We are called to be a thinking people.  I was in a Bible study once where a zealous young woman (about age 22, and new to the group) vehemently rebuked a wise, respected older man in the group who was sharing scripturally how Jesus was the only way to Salvation and how Muslims weren't headed for Heaven.  Turns out, this young woman was a Christian herself, and when backed into a corner, she admitted the older man was right, but she just felt it was judgmental for him to say it.  This is a problem.

     Even supposing for a moment that I am overstepping bounds in stating something is sinful, those who feel the need to correct me should do it in love, not harshness or judgment.  That's right.  It is just as judgmental to criticize a fundamentalist Christian as it is to criticize anyone else.  Harping on me isn't going to make me change, but loving consideration might.  And that's even assuming that what I have said is sinful or out of line.  Sometimes it could be, but often it isn't.

     As Christians, we are called to align our beliefs and lifestyles with God's word.  Second Timothy 2:15 tell us Study to show thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.  A chapter and a verse later, in 3:16, we are reminded that all scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, and instruction in righteousness.  That is our authority.  I'm not making a nasty judgment against someone because I dislike them.  I often like these people very much personally.  Out of love for them and hopes that they will come to know Christ, I speak in agreement with the Bible.  This is actually much more loving than pacifying people and agreeing with them to make them feel good.  God tells us how it will end.  He tells us that those who reject Jesus will be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord (Second Thessalonians 1:9).  Revelation 20:15 expounds on this by saying that these unbelievers will be thrown into the lake of fire.  I don't want that for anyone!  I want everyone to be redeemed from this.  I want all to know the joy that comes from having their sins forgiven and a right relationship with God--both now and for all eternity.  That is why I speak out.  It is possible for Christians to fall into sin as well, and while they will never bear the eternal consequence for it (since Jesus already did), they will lose joy in their lives, and not be able to enjoy the full fellowship with God.  Psalm 32 testifies to this, when David talks about how miserable he was when he was living in a sinful situation.  Believers can be made miserable by their sin, and I don't want this for anyone either.  In love, as the Holy Spirit leads, I may speak up--and I hope others would do the same for me when I err. The Bible gives steps for confronting believers in sin (Matthew 18).

     A lot of people say that Jesus never judged others, but simply loved.  This isn't quite accurate.  He knew the judgment was coming, and talked about it.  Many of His parables discuss the difference between the righteous, who go on to everlasting life, and the wicked, who go to eternal punishment (Luke 13:27-28).  If there weren't a judgment, we wouldn't need a Savior, and He wouldn't have come at all.  He was very loving to people, but He never condoned sin.  In John 8:11, He told the woman caught in adultery, "Go and sin no more."  He called the Pharisees a "brood of vipers" (Matthew 12:34).  When the people in the temple were taking advantage of others, Jesus vehemently turned over their tables and disrupted what they were doing.  He didn't just smile and say, "I'm not here to judge."  He had righteous indignation.  Not quite the meek picture of Jesus a lot of people want to have.  And yet He was humble and meek as well.

    

     Jesus had a cousin named John the Baptist.  John was about six months older than Jesus, and had a very special calling on his life.  He was called by God to be a forerunner of Jesus, to prepare people for Him.  John was known as quite eccentric.  According to John 1, he didn't consider himself to be a prophet, but the one called to prepare the world for the Messiah.  He called people to repent and be baptized.  He had quite a following, but when Jesus came on the scene, John turned everyone's attention to Jesus, not himself (John 1:29).  He said, "He must increase, I must decrease." (John 3:30).  John was known for speaking very openly and blatantly about sin.  After all, he was calling people to repent.  He was preparing them for the Savior.  They wouldn't need a Savior if they weren't ready to admit to their sins.  John had a task.  He spoke openly about all that wasn't right.  He had criticized a very public sin of King Herod.  Herod had taken his brother's wife.  John didn't beat around the bush.  He publicly declared this to be wrong (Matthew 14:4).  He didn't try to avoid judging him.  He didn't try to sympathize with Herod, or mind his own business.  He spoke out.  How many today would do that, in our politically-correct world?  John had guts, but I believe he had something even more than that.  He had the mandate and approval of God.  John's speaking the truth cost him his life.

     Some might consider John the Baptist to be a bit out of line, or over the top.  But Jesus Himself approved of John's ministry.  In Matthew 11:11, Jesus said, "Truly I say to you, among those born of women there has not arisen anyone greater than John the Baptist."  This would have been Jesus' chance to say, "Well, he did some good stuff, but he was too legalistic and judgmental."  But He didn't say that.  John had been in God's will.  Maybe Christians today who speak out against sin are in God's will too, and should be supported, not silenced or labeled as judgmental by their brother and sisters in Christ who are just too uncomfortable to do the same.

     Some will still argue, "Yes, but Jesus said not to judge!"  They are referring to Matthew 7:1, which says, Judge not, lest you be judged.  This is probably the most well-known (and misused) verse today.  Even people who give no mind or credence to the Bible will quote this if anyone even remotely disagrees with them.  They are taking it out of context.  Jesus said this in the middle of the Sermon on the Mount.  He wasn't saying we can't hold beliefs, or disagree with anyone.  If He was, that would contradict the rest of scripture.  The verses following explain that we need to get our own lives in order, and then we can help others with their lives.  If I come down on you for something, but I'm doing the same thing, I'm going to face the same criticism (and rightfully so).  I need to get it right in my life first, before I help you.  That's what this passage is talking about.  It isn't saying we can never confront or speak out against something.  John 7:24 sheds further light on this topic when it says, Do not judge by mere appearances, but judge righteous judgment.  In other words, have all the facts before you make a judgment about a person or situation.  Don't assume (we all know what happens when we assume, right? HA! HA!).

     Nowhere in the Bible are we told to turn off the brains God gave us.  Nowhere are we told that excusing sin is compassionate.  We are told to speak the truth, whether people want to hear it or not (in season or out of season Second Timothy 4:2).  We are to be humble but confidant on the authority of God's word.  At the end of it all, do you want to look into the face of someone who thanks you for sharing the truth with them and saving their soul, or hear the cries of someone you affirmed on earth being cast into the lake of fire?  The choice is yours.

How does it feel?

     If there is one place Christians should feel loved and accepted, it should be the Body of Christ.  We share so much--our faith in Jesus, our destiny in Heaven, our love for the Lord.  Jesus Himself said that the way people would recognize that we are His people is by our love for one another (John 13:35).  I find it interesting He didn't say that the watching world would know we are His by our love for Him, or for the unsaved (though we should be loving Him, and the unsaved).  The biggest testimony to the lost is that Christians love each other.

     Sadly, this often doesn't happen the way Jesus commanded.  I imagine all of us believers have been wounded by other Christians at times.  It is more devastating when the attack comes from Christians.  It has to be.  Here we share something so beyond ourselves.  We have every reason to cling together.  But we don't.  Not always.  It isn't just us.  It was that way in Acts.  People were coming to Jesus from different parts of Israel, and even outside of the Jewish faith.  As they got saved, they brought their cultures and conflicts with them.  This led to the church leaders having the counsel at Jerusalem in Acts 15.  What we can gather from this is that culture plays a huge part into who we are, even as Christians.  This can be a uniting or a dividing force.  What we share as Christians should be so much greater than any difference.  But so often, we lose sight of it.

     On Facebook, one page I follow is a particular Conservative Christian group.  They share a lot of really good resources and articles.  Last night, something they shared brought out a lot of ugliness in people, myself included.  The article was about how the US population was redistributing itself, due to people moving out of states like California, New York and Illinois.  Admittedly, these three states are known for liberal politics.  Think for a second, what kind of people would move out of liberal states?  The answer should be fairly obvious: Conservatives, many of whom are Christians.  The liberals have no reason to leave these states.  They are getting their own way from corrupt state governments (many of whom were voted in by deceased people who had not been cleared off the voting registration).  There is heart-breaking corruption in these places.  A lot of Conservatives feel they have no choice but to leave.  However, the people who read the article got very unkind, particularly trashing Californians (not the state, but the actual residents) talking about how stupid and worthless they all are, and how they're trying to move to others states to make them as corrupt as the one they came from.  How smart would that be?  I have just established that the Conservatives are the ones leaving.  I am a Californian, a Conservative, and a Christian, and my heart broke as I read people's hate-filled comments.  They don't know me, or the wonderful Christian people I love in my home state, but they decided to hate us.  I feel very hopeless when people say stuff like that.  I can't change what state I'm from.  No one can.  The evil behind their hatred is the same evil behind racism.  No one chooses their race, but everyone deserves a chance to prove themselves before judgment.  What is distressing is that the people making these comments about me and my fellow Californians is that they are supposedly Christians (the page is geared to conservative Christians).

     I sobbed until my whole body shook.  I felt like my heart would stop beating. I hadn't been that broken since a college boyfriend dumped me many years ago.  I am hated by people who share my Lord and eternity.  Yet they hate me, call me stupid and worthless. They assume evil, wicked things about my motives, just because I happen to be from a state with a largely undeservedly bad reputation.  I love California, and never wanted to leave it. Our reasons for leaving our home state four years ago are a long story, but it has been God's leading for my husband and me.  After living in the Midwest, the Mountain states, and the South, we have concluded that the Christian community in California is a lot more in-depth and spiritually mature than I've found elsewhere.  There is corruption in the government.  Christians need to stand up and fight it.  Those not called to be involved should pray, not put us down.  After reading these mean-spirited comments from other believers, I was left feeling like there was no place for me.  That is a horrible feeling.  No Christian should feel that way, ever.  I responded with truth to some of the abusive, ignorant comments.

     First John 4:20 says: If someone says, "I love God," and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen.  Being a Christian in a world that never knew God is a hostile experience.  We can't be turning on each other.  Anyone who stops long enough to think it through should be able to figure out that no state has all good or all bad people in it.  There is always a remnant of God's people (First Kings 19:18).  California was the location of all major revival movements of the twentieth century.  There are multiple Bible colleges and seminaries there.  Even in supposedly evil Los Angeles, Christian denominations combined make up the biggest religion adhered to.  I have been in touch with a BIble-believing church in San Francisco.  They are trying to do a lot of wonderful ministry, but are attacked by the enemy in ways we can't even begin to know.  But all of that is beside the point.  Even if the Christians in California were fewer, we are still God's people, and should be loved and accepted by other believers, not attacked because of our state.  That kind of prejudice and hatred is so hurtful.  That's what I really want to say.  I hurt.  My soul aches to be loved by other Christians.  I want to belong.  I want to hear the words of Cheri Keaggy's song "Bring it all in" Come in, bring it all in.  We've got a place for you, there's enough grace for you.  God only knows where you've been.  Bring it all in.  We need to love and extend grace to each other.  We are hurting in a world that has rejected our Savior.  We can't go rejecting each other.  

     Let's pray for God to change our hearts and make us the loving people He wants us to be.  I don't feel very loving toward those who said those hateful things.  Clearly, they don't love me or my people  That isn't right.  Also, pray for Christians living in states that don't listen to their votes.  Did you know California is the only state that voted TWICE to keep marriage between one man and one woman?  Most states didn't vote at all, but those who did only did once.  California really wanted to keep things right.  No one talks about that. They just talk about how evil California supposedly is, and all it's residents along with it.  Pray for Christians in these places.  They are fighting spiritual battles you don't know about.  They don't want to fight their fellow Christians in other states as well!  They are your brothers and sisters.

     One thing that has comforted me was something my husband reminded me of.  Jesus was from Nazareth, and in John 1:14, Nathaniel said, "Can any good thing come out of Nazareth?"  Jesus was from a place with a bad reputation.  He was misjudged because of it.  He knows the plight of Californian Christians.  He loves us and cries with us when we are rejected by those who have been commanded to love us.  It hurts Him too.  Please pray for me, because it is so hard being a Californian out of state.  People can be so cruel.  That isn't right.  Come on, Christians, let's follow Jesus' command to love one another.  No one else will want to know our Lord until we do.